Biography
the Ballad of the Trike
The story of I Like My Trike begins like most epic music tales: in the American South. When David Cox was only six years old, he escaped from an orphanage in Georgia by leaping through a windowpane. Barefoot and penniless, he wandered the back roads of Georgia countryside with only a three-string guitar and the ghost of Robert Johnson watching over him. In his late teens, his adventures eventually brought him to Utah. It was there that he met up with Todd Roberts, a male prostitute who could be found at any gig where there was a handjob involved. At this point, Todd traded ball-fondling for bass-playing (one must admit, the two are very similar). Dave and Todd got bored one summer and started making music on a computer to pass the time (as neither of them would practice otherwise).
Unbeknownst to them, the songs they were writing were being telepathically sent to them by an alien hurtling towards earth by the name of Dale Smith. Dale had just been dumped by his girlfriend, Samus Aran, after discovering his twelve star-system cheating spree (“It’s not easy dating an intergalactic bounty hunter”). He decided to head to earth to try his hand at music. Amazingly, Dale’s spacecraft crashed into Dave’s backyard during one of his jam sessions with Todd. The two both immediately knew this alien being had been sharing his mind with them. Dale busted out his bass and hopped in on the jam: it was like he’d been there all along! They realized they liked this trike and so named their band, I Like My Trike.
Meanwhile, in Chicago, the mafia don Alex Pappas was sipping on a glass of Delicatto and realized his weapons smuggling operation was heading south. Knowing that the gig was up, he availed himself of the federal Jehovah’s Witness Relocation Program to avoid those pesky proselytizers, but found himself in Salt Lake City with even more annoying people banging on his door. Eventually he stopped answering and just banged back, but in the process found his true calling as a percussionist. When he would practice the drums, he would play along with the strange music in his head, a message coming from a band half way across town. He eventually triangulated their coordinates and joined them on the kit.
And then MikeC. made some vocal sounds.
Hipsters cry, evil trembles, and panties get wet: I Like My Trike are re-making the world in their image and god help those that stand in their way.
Members
Alex
Dale
Dave
Mike
Todd
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